Cast

Edition

Calendar

Pictures
Yves Pagès Les Parapazzi
direction François Wastiaux
Excerpts

Sequence 2

Claude 1 and Claude 2 are conversing at a distance, by walkie-talkie


Claude 2, singing a cappella. - All - O - K !
Claude 1. - Shh!
Claude 2. - Hello, Claude?...
Claude 1. - Never heard of him. This is Zoom 1 here.
Claude 2. - Roger... Hasn't started yet, has it?
Claude 1. - Just stay on line and shut up.
Claude 2. - Just asking. Say, got any fags?
Claude 1. - It's too late for that.
Claude 2. - What 'm I s'posed to do then?
Claude 1. - Wait, like everyone else.
Claude 1 and Claude 2. - What a pain, this bloke! What did you say?
Claude 1. - If we talk at the same time, it jams.
Claude 2. - No problem, I can hear you.
Claude 1. - Of course you can hear me, you just answered.
Claude 2. - Say that again... I was on stand-by then.
Claude 1. - Nothing.
Claude 2. - I'm getting a whistling on on, is that normal?
Claude 1. - Go on, push the button again, so we can see. (after a moment) Stop!
Claude 2. - It's working, it's working.
Claude 1. - Stop, you're wasting the batteries.
Claude 2. - Roger, over and out.
Claude 1, after two loud rings. - What's the problem now?
Claude 2, continuous ringing. - No idea...
Claude 1,continuous ringing. - Have you checked for outside calls?
Claude 2, continuous ringing. - Affirmative, I think it's your mobile.
Claude 1, continuous ringing. - The button... top right.
Claude 2, continuous ringing. - Just a second.
Claude 1, continuous ringing. - I'm coming. (they converge) The green button !
Claude 2, continuous ringing. - I can't find it.
Claude 1, continuous ringing. - It's marked OK, it's not hard...
Claude 2, continuous ringing. - I'm still pushing. OK?...
Claude 1, continuous ringing. - Not the volume. On the mobile... (coming to meet him) What's the point of us having these things!
Claude 2, giving him his mobile. - Roger, Zoom 1...
Claude 1, grabbing the mobile. - Quick!
Claude 2, putting away his walkie-talkie. - They're no use at all, these things... (after a moment) Who was it?
Claude 1. - No-one, they hung up.
Claude 2. - Sorry, Claude... er no, not Claude.
Claude 1. - That's clever.
Claude 2. - Sorry... I repeat, sorry.
Claude 1. - What about the bag ? Where is it, quick?
Claude 2. - No panic : I put it in the cloakroom, while we're waiting.
Claude 1. - With my lenses, all the gear! But where have you landed from?
Claude 2. - You could've carried it yourself. Ten hours straight, you'll understand.
Claude 1, dragging him towards the exit. - Where's this cloakroom of yours? Hurry.
Claude 2, rummaging in his pockets. - Wait, the ticket. (pulling out the ticket) Here it is.
Claude 1, leaving. - Get a move on.
Claude 2, leaving. - You're telling me... I think she's really pretty, their cloakroom girl.
Dictaphone of M'sieur Lambda. - Dear Mademoiselle comma, you have omitted to communicate to me the code of the door of your building semicolon; I was thus not able to meet with you this day. Also comma, please call the Social Action Centre on Thursday 15th between 9.15am and 10.30am in order to give me your full address and to make a second appointment stop. In the meantime comma, your allowance is suspended stop. Yours etc. Signed colon new line: the Minimum Revenue Inspector.



Sequence 10

The interference between the recorded and the live voices becomes stronger to the advantage of random noises. Forlornly, Miss Alice dials a number on her mobile. The call rings out in the room.


Miss Alice. - Hello? Good morning, may I speak to Claude Vico please (beep) ...
Voice of Claude 1, answering, from his hideout. - Yes yes, it's me...
Miss Alice. - If you have just three little minutes to spare, I'm doing a survey for IFRAP. Are you unmarried? Under the age of fifty?
Voice of Claude 1. - Exactly right.

Miss Alice. - Your professional situation?
Voice of Claude 1. - Contract work.

Miss Alice. - Sex?
Voice of Claude 1. - Irrelevant.
Miss Alice. - All right, let's go. During a job interview, you should put the accent on: little a, your personality; little b, your experience ; little c, your physique.
Voice of Claude 1. - Little b, that's right.
Voice of Xavier Yzard. - A two year break in Paris: a time to breathe and to love. All the same, I spent some time preparing an article on the unemployed. I used to go regularly to the National Employment Office in Paris-Nord. I had taken up my Leïca again, to be more discreet. I sat on a bench with the camera under my jacket. Or else I went to watch the unemployed lining up at the soup kitchen near the Mabillon markets. It was the first time I did that in France, with people who spoke my language, I went about it all the wrong way. Without knowing, I was already checking things out for Fin de droits, my documentary on the Paris-Nord National Employment Agency, twelve years later.
Miss Alice. - For you, the ideal woman boss is: little a, ambitious ; little b, charismatic ; little c, a strong woman.
Voice of Claude 1. - That's not an easy one... little b.
Miss Alice, on the point of leaving. - A woman colleague has made a faux pas, your reaction : little a, she'll get hers; little b, it happens; little c, it doesn't surprise me.
Voice of Claude 1. - Little b.
Voice of Xavier Yzard. - The total lie is the guy who promises the subject of his photo: "I'm doing this for your good". He's there because he's going to live, to earn money by talking about all sorts of victims. Perhaps our work will be saving, perhaps it will be a disservice to them. At the time, you don't know.
Miss Alice, going away, almost inaudible. - Your secretary smokes in the office, you put her: little a, out the door; little b, out the window; little c, out of pocket.
Voice of Claude 1. - Little b... (answering emptily) little b... little b... little b...
Voice of Claude 2. - Who's "little b"?...
Voice of Claude 1, to Claude 2. - The average Frenchman. (to Miss Alice) Sorry, can you repeat the question? (a moment later) That's a hard one... no, no idea.
Voice of Claude 2. - Leave it, I want to answer.
Voice of Claude 1. - Too late.
Voice of Xavier Yzard. - I had a strange kind of adventure in Portugal, after the fall of Salazar. I had heard about some peasants who had occupied the property of a great aristocrat. Unfortunately, they couldn't stop fighting with each other. For me, it was the first time I covered any kind of revolution. And, from morning to night, enormous disagreement. No matter what became an excuse for an argument, one way or another. I was terribly frustrated. They had got their chance to speak, they didn't want to lose it. I wanted only one thing: to record the sound. (referring to an invisible photo) This one, I remember, an old peasant who refused to give up his spade to the co-operative.
The technician has technical problems again. The soundtrack is stopped until further notice. A photo appears: the facsimile of a form to help immigrants return home. In bold type: "You must leave France." A stylised bird serves as logo.
Voice of Claude 2. - The fact remains that you didn't even know how to answer.
Voice of Claude 1. - Answer what?
Voice of Claude 2. - Well, the test, you failed it.
Voice of Claude 1. - In retrospect, it was easy.
Voice of Claude 2. - Go on, give it to me.
Voice of Claude 1. - Little a, crosswords; little b, kids; little c, shopping.
Voice of Claude 2. - Little d, cooking.
Voice of Claude 1. - Little e, debts.
Voice of Claude 2. - Little f, sleepless nights.
Voice of Claude 1. - Little g, little secrets.
Voice of Claude 2. - Little h, housework.
Voice of Claude 1. - Little i, crazy things.
Voice of Claude 2. - Little j, naps.
Voice of Claude 1. - Little k, surprises.
Voice of Claude 2. - Little l, spoonerisms.
Voice of Claude 1. - Little m, miracles.
Voice of Claude 2. - Little n, cocktail snacks.
Voice of Claude 1. - Little o, mistakes.
Voice of Claude 2. - Little p, free credit at the Galeries Barbès.
Voice of Claude 1. - Little q, photos, as usual.
Voice of Claude 2. - By the way... what was the question?
Voice of Claude 1. - What would you do if you were paid to do nothing?
Voice of Claude 2. - That's it, Claude, I've got it: counterfeit money.









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