ANTOINE: (…) You came because you decided to,
it just came to you one day,
an idea, just an idea.
How did you say?
A "recommendation" you made to yourself? Shit,
or else, for many years,
do I know, how could I know
perhaps since the first day,
scarcely gone, in the train, or the next day, immediately
- always been like that, regretting everything and its opposite - for many years now, you've been saying to yourself,
you haven't stopped repeating it,
you've been saying to yourself that you really should come back one day and
visit us,
see us, see us again,
and here, suddenly, you've decided, I don't know.
D'you think it's important for me?
You're wrong, it's not important for me,
it can't be any more.

You weren't saying anything to yourself, I know, I can see you.
You weren't talking to yourself,
you didn't think you'd say anything to me,
that you wouldn't say anything to me at all,
you're talking rubbish, you're making it up.
It was here, right now,
that you saw me,
and you made it all up just to talk to me.
You weren't saying anything to yourself because you don't know me,
you think you know me but you don't know me,
you think you should know me because I'm your brother?
That's rubbish too,
you don't know me any more, you haven't known me for a long time,
you don't know who I am,
you've never known,
it's not your fault and it's not mine either,
me neither, I don't know you
(but me, I'm not claiming anything),
we don't know each other
and no-one can imagine saying such and such to
someone they don't know.
What you want to say to someone you imagine,
you imagine it too,
stories and nothing else.

What you want, what you wanted,
you saw me and you didn't know how to catch me,
"how to take me "
- you always say that, " no-one knows how to take him"
and also, I hear you, "you have to know how to take him",
like talking about an evil, brutal man -
you wanted to catch me and you tossed me that,
you know how to begin a conversation, you do it well,
it's a method, it's just a technique for drowning and killing
animals,
but I don't want to,
I don't feel like it.
Why you're here, I don't want to know,
you've got the right, that's all and nothing more,
and not to be here, you've also got the right,
it's exactly the same for me.
Here, in a way, it's your home and you can be here
any time you want to and also you can leave
it's your right, it doesn't concern me.
Not everything is extraordinary in your life,
in your ordinary life,
it's also an ordinary life, I oughtn't be afraid of that,
not everything is extraordinary,
you can try and make everything extraordinary but not everything is.

LOUIS: Where are you going?

ANTOINE: I don't want to be here.
You're going to talk to me now,
you'll want to talk to me
and I'll have to listen
and I don't feel like listening.
I don't want to. I'm scared.
You always have to tell me everything,
always, all the time,
you always talk to me and I have to listen.
People who never say anything, you just think
that they simply want to listen,
but often, you don't know,
I used to keep quiet to set an example.

Catherine!

Jean-Luc LAGARCE, Juste la fin du monde
© Les Solitaires Intempestifs

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